whats there to be nervous about?

uhhhh...how bout everything?

A couple months ago [weeks ago?] when my older sister asked me if i'd be interested in reading something at our older brothers wedding my initial thought was "NO!" & then it was "ABSOLUTELY NOT"...of course I didn't say exactly what I was thinking. I just respectfully declined. why? because i'm a bit of a "p-word" (to be completely honest). I DO NOT do public speaking. I remember stumbling, fumbling, flubbing, & sweating my way through mediocre speeches in my public speaking class - fortunately that semester we had a unusual amount of snow days & most of my assignments ended up being written & written I do very well!
But getting up in front of more than 2 people & reciting something? no thanks...
normally that would be "all she wrote" in regards to me speaking publicly
but then
my brother asked me himself.
YIKES
ru the p-word showed up first & respectfully declined - as she was pretty much born to do...but I was slightly hesitant which I had never been before.
I started thinking
and thinking and thinking and thinking
about how this wedding, my older brother's wedding, is the first of its kind for this family.
How could I pass up participating in something so significant & just so normal? and because I'm scared?
I couldn't help but think "what would my mother do?" or "what would my mother think?"
She would go up there & read the ish out of that passage - thats one.
& She'd want me to stop being a "p-word" thats for sure.
Maybe this isn't the best time to try & face my fears, maybe I should have started slow?...but if not now, when?
So i'm going to spend the next couple of hours psyching myself up.
I'm going to trick myself into believing that i'm going to be awesome.
I'm wearing flats, so i'm going to be as comfortable as possible.
I should wear my glasses so when I look up it'll all be a blur...
hmmmm...picture everyone naked?
that could get awkward.
I'm gonna speak as loudly and with as much confidence as I can muster.
"Faux Swag" as I like to call it.

If I had just manned up and karaoke'd all those times getting up and reading about 15 sentences would be cake...
but i'll be fine right?
Whats there to be nervous about?...right?